slipping away

that’s how i feel about the awesomeness i’ve been feeling the last couple months.  i have been feeling so great that i’d forgotten that i never really acknowledged that my morning sickness was completely gone.  oh- how we take our good health for granted when we have it.  it seems we only notice how great we were feeling- after we aren’t feeling great anymore. 

well, i can feel the “not feeling great anymore” sneaking right up on me.  and i’m not ready for it.  i so badly want to just carry on with my busy life, without being inhibited by my bosoming belly.  but i think it’s starting to settle in and i’m headed down that last quarter of my pregnancy where there’s just a little more discomfort in the everyday happenings of life.  i hope that i can manage gracefully and not be a burden on my family with how much i complain.

i love being pregnant.  This is my fifth “real” pregnancy (one ectopic) and it isn’t any less miraculous or exciting than my first one.  i am in complete awe of what my body is capable of.  so amazing.  i feel very blessed to be able to grow a child inside of me- no matter how uncomfortable it gets.  i would not trade this magnificent season of my life for anything.  it is simply the best.

and then i stand up.  and i have to pee [right now!] and my left leg throbs and the bottom of my weighted down tummy aches and my sciatic nerve stops me in my tracks.  but i’m not anywhere near ready to birth this child either so i’m happy to continue putting up with the minor discomforts of pregnancy so he can grow a little longer and be a little healthier and give me a little more time to get some things done. 

when i was pregnant with elli, i could NOT wait to have her.  i was so impatient, and i could not wait for the day when my life would change forever with a new baby.  now that i’m waiting for my 6th child, i feel a little bit differently.  i am perfectly content to wait as long as i can.  because i know how much my life is going to change (for better and for harder).  and it feels like time is slipping away.  2 months is not very long. 

things i’m feeling grateful for at this point (31 weeks) in my pregnancy:

• i can still sleep on my tummy (with lots of pillows buffering my tummy)
• i am fairly energetic
• i have gained an acceptable amount of weight- thus far
• i’m fairly comfortable
• the heartburn is manageable
• sciatic nerve pain isn’t constant- yet
• i can still pick up and hold (some of) my children
• my back is holding out well- so far
• i am highly motivated to scrapbook- 271 pages (and counting) since august
• my christmas shopping is well under way and nearly complete
• i have documented my pregnancy/life fairly well up until this point
• i [hope i] don’t complain much about my physical discomforts
• very minimal growing pains
• very few braxton hicks
• i sleep fairly solidly and i’m able to rest often
• i am able to clean and cook and do the things that need to be done- without too much strain on myself. 
• i’d so rather be here than back in my first trimester
• i am enjoying the baby’s movements inside of me- it doesn’t hurt right now
• i don’t have diabetes…yet
• i am still quite comfortable in and “growing into” my maternity clothes
• i still feel “pregnant cute”
• i only have 7-8 weeks left

but some things to complain about:

• that sciatic nerve debilitates me when it acts up.  ouch
• my back is starting to get tired and achy
• i am starting to wake up too often in the night- both to pee and to readjust my back
• those varicose veins are really starting to ache- in lots of inconvenient places
• i’m tired just from waking up
• i need to go to the bathroom all the time
• my tummy is starting to feel tight and stretched to capacity
• i have a strange appetite that i can’t seem to figure out
• my boobs still itch like crazy
• my burps are not very womanly
• i weigh more than damon
• my kids keep telling me how much i’m “growing”
• i don’t have a clue what we’re naming this kid
• i only have 7-8 weeks left!

i’m relieved my gratitude list is longer than my complaints! 

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